Knights: Crazy Bastards

 So while Conquer was playing "Skyrim" again, me and Bizkit decided to go into my own world to finish a personal project of mine. No I am not building a strip club.

Before I begin: To add to Conquer's Quest-to-kill-loot-and-maim-everything quest, he finally found out who owns the lumber mill! Only he Dragon shouted her into a raging river.

"Don't worry," he saids calmly, "I know a bunch of other lumber mills." Yeah, and you plan on looting them, and shouting random words of pain at those owners, too?

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Back to Minecrafting: My buddy, who I shall call "Bizkit", decided to aid me in my quest to secure wool, feathers and pork chops! How nice of him right?

Well I have a question for you readers!

1) When your friends help you gather supplies, do they:

A) Politely tell you to "fuck off and get it yourself you lazy bitch"?
B) Be good sports and fetch the items you asked for; like a well trained puppy?
C) Shout random profanity, grunts, yells while killing anything that walks on four legs? All while holding a flower?

Trust me: This wasn't a pretty sight five seconds later

If Minecraft had the ability to add blood, gore, guts, etc. I would be spending the entire time cleaning up the entrails of those poor animals.

At least he didn't paint the town red. No town to paint, but I digress.

About ten minutes in, and hiding in a corner until the "boogeyman" went away, (if I had a teddy bear and a blanket I'm sure my avatar would've been holding one) he comes back to me with more loot than I could've taken a picture of.

Who's a good murderous knight???

I think I found Conquer's Minecraft twin: Minus the Dragon shouting.

Conquer decided building his house in "Skyrim" was a pain in the ass, so we headed to the survival world.

While camping in the bar, we heard a lot of ruckus from the neighbors upstairs (mainly spiders, of course).

"What's all that noise?" Conquer asked politely. I was half expecting him to pull out a sword or Dragon shout me off a fucking cliff.

Upon morning I decided to go and see what those damn kids were up to, but within me leaving the bar I heard "Oh gosh! Oh gosh! They're after me!" Either Bizkit was being attacked by the ghosts of the animals he just killed, (preferably) or spiders were attacking him.

The latter.

They're Ba-aaaaaack.......

This isn't the first time Bizkit was in the starring role of "When spiders attack!" oh, hell no! But what was funny was that four spiders, (only two shown, the other two were behind me) were camping the door waiting to kick Bizkit's ass!

If only animals/spiders could talk. They would say, "We are the avengers of the fallen. We bring pain and suffering to those who destroy our brothers and sisters. Resistance is futile."

And that's how spiders became my Best Friend's Forever.