Friday, December 7, 2012

Caution: Assassin's may rewire your crap to kill you

 So more Dishonored shenanigans for ya. This time the events that took place were totally not my fault. Most of it.

So I was sent on a mission to find this important character of the game, who was being held in a brothel of all places (this game is based around Victorian-era London I presume).

Before I move on, the game has these whale oil tanks that everyone uses to power just about anything. These tanks, are very volatile: sneeze at them and kaboom.

So I was at a intersection where these pylons (one was adjacent to the other in a doorway) were giving off electricity. Thankfully a couple of guards were standing there having a conversation about this thing.

Turns out it's called a "Wall of Light." Basically only city guards can pass through unharmed. Everyone else who touches it, soon goes zap! Kerplunk! Boom! And turns into ash and takes the stairway to heaven. Or bullet train to hell whatever works.

Now here's just one of the awesome things about Dishonored: these "wall of light's" (and other gadgets that can kill you) have a wire leading it to a whale oil tank, OR a console you can re-wire so that it don't kill you, but fries the city guard.

Thankfully, where I was hiding, there were three tanks + the one plugged in. But I decided I wanted to be evil for a minute. In order to hack these consoles, you need a re-wire tool. I had three. So with Dumb and Dumber still talking, I sneakily (it's a word) went up to the box, opened her up and re-wired that sucker.

A message pops up saying you no longer will get hurt from these things. Unfortunately my electrician skills didn't go unoticed. Dumb and Dumber noticed me and called upon their five or six other guys on the other side of said wall for help. Dumber however is very impatient, and decided to try and shoot me with a bloody pistol.

He didn't put into perspective that I was standing behind thick sheets of metal framing, and four volatile tanks within his cross-hairs. Just before he pulled the trigger, a buddy of his runs right into the wall, and turns into a pit of ash, just as Dumber pulls the trigger, igniting the barrels, and sending him and his buddy Dumb a free friggn' trip to the Moon.

"Well that was entertaining!" I said aloud. After that, the rest of the pack of dumbasses formed a nice neat line and one-by-one got burned to a crisp as they walked into my wall of pain. I never said they were smart guards.

It turns out after a certain number of things run into the wall, it turns off because it runs out of whale oil juice. Pretty much my fault as I chucked in a couple of dead bodies I had strewn around the map. Cutting out the middle man and saving the mortician the leisure of screwing with bodies.

Why should they have all the fun?

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