A life lesson: with Metro 2033

 So for a couple of days now I have been going back to "Metro 2033", to brush up my skills for "Last Light". Well that, and Conquer was away and Bizkit was playing some shitty-ass games. I think one was called Forza, another Gears of something...

Anyways, for awhile I have been meaning to get the "Ranger pack" for the game. But I have been too lazy to actually get it, and it cost around 800 Microsoft points or so. Either way, my Bullshit meter went off when I saw it on sale for 150 points.

Now I usually don't play a game over and over again. So far Dead Space, and the original Halo are sole single-player games that I have played more than 12+ times. No, I am not kidding. Yes, I do have a life, thank you!

Metro is one of those games. Yet as soon as I loaded up "Ranger normal" mode, it was obvious this was gonna be a bitch.

You almost never have ammo, and the enemies will send you packing more times than an average day playing "Dark Souls".

However, you finally are shooting real bullets instead of mushed fucking peas, (a big complaint when the game was released), and you have a couple of new toys to play with: The Volt driver, and the Shotgun Machinegun.

But sometimes happiness is in shrapnel and belt-fed.

Happiness is Pneumatic and electrocuted...

 If you per-ordered the game you got the Auto-shotty free. It still fired mushed peas though...

I immediately used the volt driver, but learned quickly it's kinda hard to aim. Once that learning curve is down, almost anything goes down in one hit. So I gave it the name "Betsy", for good measure.

I didn't even fully use "Betsy" until a stealth mission halfway through the game. Where you must sneak past the frontlines between the Reds (Commies) and the Nazis (self-explanatory).

I learned quickly why I always went gun-ho in this level; stealth is very, very, touchy. First time through I got stuck in a passageway, and would be slaughtered no matter what I did.

"Ok!" I shouted at the t.v. screen, "Ya wanna play that game?!"

Second time through: Stealth through the Red lines, and made it to the soon-to-be-BBQ-ed lines of the Nazis. Turns out the volt driver can send a body flying, as I found myself laughing at the rag doll physics in motion. One guy flew into his partner causing him to basically think "what the hell just happened?" Short answer: I shoot you in the balls with "Betsy".

Needless to say I learned a valuable lesson: If in doubt and forced to stealth; remain calm, charge up your volt driver, and introduce the enemy to some well-needed "Shock therapy."

You could say the enemy was: *puts on sunglasses* Shocked, to see me.

Update: Volt Driver (Left), and Auto-Shotgun (Right), were pulled from the internet.